I'm in Los Angeles, doing my level best not to cough on anyone famous (ESPECIALLY Alec Baldwin). Ryan Seacrest is working the Red Carpet (he works so much I'm beginning to believe he's a gay cyborg).
Bobblehead Girl is babbling about live-texting your votes for the Academy Awards winners. Who cares what the rabble think? They don't, but it fills up the airtime.
So far I'm watching the celebrities come down the red carpet, and trying not to get pushed over by two nonentities from TV. Amanda Seyfried looks like she's wearing fish scales. Oh, god, Little Blond Man is on. I might start retching.
Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog