Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Off For The Weekend, Dahlings!!


Thank GOD for Memorial Day Weekend. I'm fleeing New York and all of the Ebay hazurai (a Jewish friend used that word and it seemed to sum up exactly what's happening, however, I haven't the faintest clue how to spell it). Off to my beautiful oceanfront mansion in the Hamptons (featured in Architectural Digest)!

There, I and many other rich and famous people shall mingle, laugh, drink and forget our troubles. Bucky the Wonderdog will be able to frolic freely with his peers. Although his tendency to attack without warning has caused some over-sensitive dog owners to clutch their wee ones to their chests and run when they see us coming. At least I assume it's because of Bucky...

I've assembled a simply fabulous wardrobe for the weekend, lots of big flowered Italian straw hats to ward off the sun and plenty of sunblock. Must keep my creamy skin milk-white, you know, it's good for business. Maxi dresses will be the building block of choice...I simply detest wide-leg jeans! My maxi-dresses will be vintage, however, not knockoffs from Target. Bohemian soul that I am at heart, most of my time will be spent barefoot.

That reminds me...must tell my assistant to book a pedicure, STAT!

My guests are the Creme de Mer of the fashion industry, naturally, I name no names. But as been written here before, until you have seen Andre Leon Talley with a champagne bucket upside-down on his head, you have not lived.

The staff has been working night and day getting the mansion ready. I know, because I have Hide-A-Cams all over the place. Idle hands and all that, you know. My assistant started to weep when I told her to cancel her plans and come with me, stupid thing. What on earth is so special about Pittsburgh?

Until next week, dahlings, have a wonderful weekend, drive safely, and remember, hot pants do not look good on anyone!

Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

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