Sunday, March 02, 2008

Policing The Oscar Fashion Police...


Yesterday, while taking a well-deserved rest between performances of my show, I watched “Oscar Fashion Police” on some basic cable channel…I believe it was E!.

All I can say is, mon dieu! Who ARE these people? A parade of stumpy little men with strange haircuts, some woman named Debbie Matenopoulous, and the fabulous Kimora. They were calling the stars’ clothes “disgusting”, “a disgrace,” “ridiculous.”

Now, as you all know, I am all for freedom of speech, particularly when it comes to slagging celebrities. But this is simply too much, particularly coming from the stumpy little men. Debbie Maten-what’s-her-name was wearing a blinding pink parody of a bridesmaid’s dress, with an enormous bow that dwarfed her tiny little face and badly dyed hair. Kimora looked considerably more glamorous than she did at the Academy Awards, thank goodness.

During the Oscars, Kimora bore an unnerving resemblance to Imelda Marcos. I have been unable to find a picture; perhaps it has been suppressed.

Not that I didn’t agree with some of their choices. Although Johnny Depp didn’t look that bad. (His wife was another story.) But to be so brutal…no wonder celebrities look so dull on the red carpet. The tiniest misstep is called “ghastly”. One little man had bleached white hair standing straight up—who on earth is he to call anyone on the (red) carpet for fashion missteps?

Your faithful correspondent needed to get that off her creamy chest. I have a performance tonight, so I must go lie down. Bucky has been sulking because he is not allowed to play himself onstage. However, it is a non-Equity production, and he’s a member, so he would have had to play under a false name. And it’s hard enough to make him obey under his own.

Elisa & Bucky the Wonderdog

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